As many of you know, I started the Fall 2002 semester as a Chemistry UTeach student, meaning I was a chemistry student studying a particular course of study for secondary education as well as chemistry itself.
I spent a successful year in the program, complete with the “Step 1″ (UTS 101) and “Step 2″ (UTS 110) courses. Step 1 took me to Campbell Elementary School where I taught a little science to third graders, and Step 2 took me to Kealing Middle School where I taught a little science to a combined 7th and 8th grade class.
I enjoyed the classroom work; I enjoyed teaching and received glowing remarks on my evaluations. I felt at home in the classroom and it seemed to go pretty well. I was never big on working with younger students but it went well.
I left the program last year due to certain ideological differences between the UTeach Program rationale and my own. At the time, I felt certain that the program was to blame and of course, I could not be at fault.
During the time between then and now, I took classes unrelated to chemistry and education. In that time period, I realized that I did enjoy the concept of education and the conveying of information from myself to someone else.
With that in mind, I took a step forward and reflected upon my decision to leave. Perhaps, I thought, that I left in haste and that while the program may have flaws that I as well was flawed in my thinking. For me, it was a big step forward. When I am sure of something, I am sure of something and to admit that I was flawed before is something that I do not do often. If anything, I usually will admit to having new observations that would change my thinking- not that the original thinking in and of itself was flawed. That is neither here nor there however.
So, I revisited the UTeach-Natural Sciences advisor, re-applied to the program and signed up for Classroom Interactions (EDC 371:21). I’ve been to the class once and I have now come to a new conclusion: I want an exit strategy to leave The University as fast as possible with whatever degree will get me out. The College of Education and the UTeach-NS program is sucking the lifeblood out of me. I walked into my first class on Wednesday ready to tackle the world. I told myself that I could do anything, I could conquer any class. I walked into Organic Chemistry, Genetics, Calculus and Pseudoscience with academic vigor that I have not experienced in some time. I left with increased vigor- and some realization that some of the work will be stupid and mundane but nonetheless, with increased vigor. Thursday, I walked into Calculus discussion and Classroom Interactions. I felt lost in Calculus trying to recall things that I have not studied since my sophomore year of high school but knowing that I do somewhere have this knowledge somewhere in my mind. I left knowing that I can complete this class. I brought that vigor to Classroom Interactions. In the seventy-five minutes that followed, I lost all of that.
I am not sure if it was the professor confessing that she knows very little about Science Education. Maybe it was the concept maps that we had to draw; since after all, connecting the word “lab” to “science” is a deep concept that will really aid in my personal interaction with students. Connecting concepts is a beyond-fundamental concept in education, in my opinion. Someone who does not realize that concepts must connect and conveying that connection is important is aiding students in information retention should not be allowed anywhere close to a child.
What is the problem? Is there something wrong with me that would make me a poor candidate for teaching? Is there something wrong with me that would make me a poor candidate for teaching as defined by this program? Is there something wrong with the program? Is this one of the flaws of the educational system that we keep hearing about? Are they trying to fix those flaws using a method that does not sync with my desire to fix the flaws?
The College of Education and the UTeach-NS program gives me nothing but the desire to get as far away from education, academia, The University, the school, and the concept of anything of the above. Why is that? I really do not understand why this is happening. Why is an education program driving me away from education, even my own desire to further my own knowledge? The International Baccalaureate program, and the teachers who taught me within it, strengthen my foundational belief that education is for life and for the whole person. The whole person must be educated and that the pursuit of information, knowledge and new ideas never ends. Why is a program designed to help me instill that desire into others is leading me away from that very desire?
is it just me?
politics are never fun
This story broke some time ago and I am a little behind the curve. For those who haven’t heard, Crisis magazine’s publisher- Deal Hudson- was involved in some sort of “inappropriate sexual relationship” with a freshman female student during his time at Fordham University; the relationship led to his resignation in 1994.
Deal Hudson, in addition to being the publisher of a conservative Catholic magazine, was, until his very recent resignation, also an advisor to George W. Bush on Catholic affairs. A liberal Catholic publication, the National Catholic Reporter broke the story.
There are many comments being said about the story. People are saying that this story is retribution for Hudson’s part in getting a John Kerry supporter fired from the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops or that this is another attempt to force-fumble the Bush’s moral high-road political angle.
First, one quick political point. Both parties sin. Sin is not Democratic nor Republican. We learned this during the Clinton scandel fallout- Republican Senators had their own little scandels pop up around the same time. On the same token, both parties can repent and start anew. Sexual sins are committed by man (mankind) and are not limited to only the immoral, poor, Democrat, Republican or whatever.
Virtually everyone has their weak point, their cross to bear so to speak. Sometimes we carry that cross in ways that would make everyone proud, if they knew of the true struggle. Sometimes, we fall. Sadly, we take others down in the process many times.
I am not attempting to defend Hudson. I’ve met him once and spoke with him for a couple of minutes after a lecture he gave at The University last year. He seems like nice enough of a guy that has a deep passion for orthodox (or conservative or what-have-you) Catholicity. I’m sure he probably is in many ways as well. What he did, however, was wrong and he acknowledges it. He repented and is trying to start anew. I will give him the benefit of the doubt on that he is sincere in his repentence and his attempts to “go and sin no more.”
The news media picking up the story and running with it is not surprising. For better or worse, it is news. What many people forget though that to sin is human. It is what seperates us from the divine and it is a seperation we must work to close.
Just because someone has a checkered past does not, by definition, make them a horrible person or makes them anything subhuman. However, those who fall the hardest and the furtherest have the most to gain from the experience.
Should someone who has committed that sin not be able to function as a moral advisor to the White House? If it is someone who saw no fault in the sin, he probably would not be the best candidate. If it is someone who knows it was wrong and acts in a positive fashion upon that regret, I cannot think of a reason that he is unable to perform.
I am no fan of the political process and so it makes no difference to me if Hudson remained an advisor to the White House or not. However, I think it would have been a good story to tell for him, or the White House, or whomever, to tell him to stay in that post and let people know that you can be more than your worst action. To sin is human, but to forgive is divine. I think it would have been a good story to hear of that- not just of another political operative shut down by a night of regret.
fall 2004: so it begins
Today marks the first day of classes for The University of Texas at Austin. I was hoping to be full of interesting things to take note of and pass along to this weblog. After four classes and one discussion section, all of which lasted the entire hour, I have nothing.
For everyone at UT, you will appreciate this though. I was walking towards RAS for my BIO 325 discussion. Since I have never been to the RAS, I checked the campus map on the East Mall to double-check where it was. A small group of freshmen were huddled around it trying to figure out where MEZ is located. I overheard them and promptly reply “oh, it’s at the southeast end of the Six Pack.” They look at me, confused to no end and reply: “What’s the Six Pack?”
This semester should include some interesting posts on genetics, pseudoscience, classroom interactions and whatever else comes across my desk in the next few months.
Lastly, to keep as many entries on here informational, Austrian researchers have teleported photons across the Danube River. The article says not to look for Star Trek to become a reality anytime soon; however, personally, I think it’s pretty cool.
pack saddle pass
It’s been a good period since last reflecting upon whatever I reflect upon on here. That has mostly been because there hasn’t been much to discuss. The summer semester has come and gone with the fall approaching us on Wednesday.
I’m putting on hold the project to compare the current translation of the Missal to the draft copy leaked from the ICEL. All the places that had leaked copies have removed them and I would rather not republish it. Once a new translation comes out, perhaps then I will resume the task.
Even with that, the vacation is over and it’s about to be time to get back to work.
